Single Dad Laughing, from a post in FB and read his incredible post, I'm Christian, Unless You're Gay. This man has a tremendous understanding of love and compassion that I have only seen in a few men in my time, unfortunately. My hope is there are really a lot more out there I just haven't seen them.
He speaks of what it truly means to be loving and accepting of people that are different than we are, of loving people because they deserve it just by existing, no matter what they look like, what they believe, how they dress, what decisions they have made etc. He put it into words that, if you don't get it, I hope you read it again, and again until you do.
Dan, the author of Single Dad Laughing, makes me wish he had been my dad, never mind that I am now a grandmother and obviously older than he is. I went exploring on his site and discovered he has written several books one of which is called Real Dad Rules that I plan on purchasing and reading. I haven't met Dan and I am sure he isn't perfect but how refreshing to hear his perspective on parenting and the things he finds most important for himself and his son, which you can read a lot about on his blog.
As for the original blog post that pulled me to his site, I believe that when people make fun of others, put them down and do mean and hateful things, it is because they lack love and compassion for themselves. They have to tear others down to try and make themselves feel better. After all they can tell themselves at least they are better than that gay, ugly, fat, short, pagan, messy, cheap, bleeding heart, disorganized, you get the idea.
I have to admit, I am guilty of judging others, most people have. I once wore a rubber band around my wrist, for several weeks (I had intended to wear it for one day), to lightly snap every time I had a negative thought toward another person and as a reminder to think loving thoughts toward others. I discovered just how many judgements I had and how hard it was to stop.
I was made fun of as a child and was under the misconception that I would never hurt anyone like that. That I would never judge someone because they dressed differently, thought differently, spoke differently, looked differently but I hadn't truly let go of all of the hurts from the past. I held onto them like badges of courage and it prevented me from living in the moment, compassionately, lovingly toward myself and others. As I am far from perfect I am still working on letting all of them go. I think it may be time to revisit the rubber band to see how much I have healed and let go of. I would like to hope that I have let go of a lot.
I hope you decide to take the time to look at your insides, the injuries that you have left unforgiven, the past hurts that you have let jade your thinking that has allowed you to make excuses for your behavior. Ask what needs to be let go of to empower your life so that you can truly love yourself again. It is possible to live an authentic life filled with love. May you stop judging yourself and allow love to flow through your very being.
Do something loving for yourself today. You deserve it.
P.S. I would love to hear your healing story on how you transformed or are transforming your judgements.